When you have to tell your parents that you have after school detention, how you tell them is going to influence how they view the situation and how they feel about it. Don't distort the truth to avoid trouble, or justify the behavior that earned detention and don't blame others. Those tactics will make the situation worse. Instead, tell your parents honestly and in a way that enables them to respect you.
This is going to be a conversation that involves a bit of presentation, so you need to choose the right time to sit down and talk. It should be a time when your parents can give you their full attention, not in the middle of cooking dinner or when rushing around trying to get everybody ready for work and school. Try to be considerate about the time you choose. Don't have the conversation immediately after they get home from work or when they're stressed about household matters. Let them have a little bit of time to relax. If they are busy people, schedule a time. Ask your parents when they can sit down with you.
2Honesty Really is the Best Policy
Parents respect honesty, especially when you've made a mistake or done something wrong, because it is harder to be honest in those situations. Just calmly tell the truth – the whole truth. Don't try to minimize the actions that led to being given detention and don't blame anybody else. Own every bit of it. This is important. It demonstrates maturity and builds trust. If you aren't honest, and your parents find that out from school officials, you may have more than detention to contend with. Your parents may add further consequences for being dishonest than they would have for the behavior that earned the detention.
This is the most important part of your presentation, and will be a strong influence on how your parents react to the situation. Honesty is great, but explaining what you learned and what you'll do differently in the future is better. If you got detention for being late to class or if you are late with an assignment, then have a plan for better time management. If you were texting or talking in class, make a commitment to keeping classroom time for learning, using time out of class for personal matters. Taking steps to correct your own behavior shows that you are trying to take responsibility for your actions, which is an important sign of maturity.
Your parents may still be upset, but when you tell them like this, they'll be a lot less upset. If you are speaking calmly to them, they are likely to also be calm, though they are still going to have a few things to say. Listen to them respectfully. If they decide that they need to add consequences to the detention, then accept those consequences gracefully, without arguing. Everything in life has consequences, good and bad. That's how we learn to make better choices. Being honest about what you did and sincere about what you'll do differently will impact how your parents handle the situation. You may even be surprised by how understanding they'll be when you take this approach.
Sharon Secor began writing professionally in 1999, while attending Empire State University. Secor specializes primarily in personal finance and economics, and writes on a broad range of subjects. She is published in numerous online and print publications, including Freedom's Phoenix, the ObscentiyCrimes and the American Chronicle.
Mom, Dad, I'm so ashamed and embarrassed, but I have some bad news to tell you. Today I did …. (tell them waht you did that warranted the detention)… and (tell them how the teacher found out)… and now I'm on detention. I'm so sorry.
For example, if you were being a distraction in class, tell your teacher "I'm sorry for distracting my classmates.I regret that my actions hurt you and them." If a teacher sees that you are taking responsibility for your actions, they may decide that you no longer need detention.
Generally, detentions are not recorded on your permanent high school record, also known as your transcript. Transcripts typically include your academic performance, such as courses taken and grades achieved, and do not always contain information about minor disciplinary actions like detentions.
Detention has been used to make students aware that they are not completing or doing their work, displaying correct behavior in various situations, not behaving or completing task, or having the appropriate actions in given situations. Detention is one of the most common punishments in United States.
Typically, detentions are served after school. Instead of going home at the end of the day, the student reports to a designated classroom where he or she must sit in a desk for an amount of time generally rang- ing from 10 minutes to two hours, with an hour or less being most typical.
Students who are frequently disciplined may be more motivated to improve their behavior in order to avoid further punishment. Increased opportunities for academic support. Detention and suspension can provide students with additional opportunities for academic support, such as tutoring or remediation.
Generally, colleges don't see detentions on your record as they're considered a minor disciplinary action. However, if your detentions were part of a larger issue which resulted in a suspension or expulsion, that information would be included in your disciplinary record and could potentially be seen by colleges.
Some teachers feel that detention should be spent productively, working on homework or other assignments, while other instructors prefer the classic ''seated silence'' tactic in which students are not allowed to do anything.
California Penal Code § 4532 PC makes it a felony for anyone who has been arrested, charged, or convicted of a crime to escape from custody. The penalties depend on the underlying crime the defendant was in custody for and whether the defendant used force or violence in the escape attempt.
So when you fail to show up for a detention, you have to face the consequences. Your punishment is a suspension. One of the reasons that students are suspended is to make sure everyone understands that a person can't just do what he or she wants in school.
So when you fail to show up for a detention, you have to face the consequences. Your punishment is a suspension. One of the reasons that students are suspended is to make sure everyone understands that a person can't just do what he or she wants in school.
Stay honest when you explain to them what happened. If you didn't study, tell them. If you tried your best but still failed, tell them. Something you could say is “I had a hard time understanding the material,” or “I didn't study for the test, which led to me doing poorly on it.”
Apologize for whatever got you into trouble. Your parents will appreciate that you acknowledge your wrongdoing. Saying sorry can go a long way. Even if you don't think you did something wrong, try to understand the problem from your parents' point of view.
In fact, it is usually best to be open and honest with your child as early as you can. Children are very sensitive to what is happening around them and they will often pick up that the adults that are caring for them are stressed or upset.
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